No words can describe the feelings now. After drifting for more than 5 years, only hoping that somehow to be recognize the hard work, finally realizes that one has been drifting in circles and the true reality is, the surroundings tells you, you come back to the starting point again.
Positively, it's a new starting point. You can make it work in a new start. But it is not a fresh new start.
The feeling of abandonment is deeply carved into the mind and soul, in the most helpless way. Nothing can change the outcome. The finale. The end.
Yet it is comforting that this passage come into my mind :
“The Lord will deliver them to you, and you must do to them all that I have commanded you. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.””
Deuteronomy 31:5-6 NIV
Whatever outcome happens, i surrender all to God for He is my shepherd, my guide in this wildness.
“For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; ‘he will lead them to springs of living water.’ ‘And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.’ ””
Revelation 7:17 NIV
Shepherd of my soul, I give You full control,
Wherever You may lead, I willl follow.
I have made the choice, to listen for Your voice,
Wherever You may lead, I will go.
Be it in a quiet pasture, or by a gentle stream,
The Shepherd of my soul is by my side.
Should I face a nightly mountain,
Or a valley dark and deep.
The Shepherd of my soul will be my guide.
By Marty Nystrom
